When it comes to romantic relationships, I would sadly say that I don’t believe that I’ve been in love before. I don’t think I’ve ever said “I love you” to anyone other than family members. There’s one thing I know about love. It really has little to do with words. It’s not an emotion either. Love is really something we should do every day to everyone. Not when we “feel” like it. Love is something that you do.
The Commoditization of Love
We use the word love a lot, without really knowing what it truly means. We say it for very trivial things. I love going to the store at night, or I love eat breakfast for dinner. When we use the word in such a way, it decreases the meaning of such a sacred word. How can someone feel love when you say I love you, but also say I love bacon in the same breath? There are also people like me who kind of have a hard time saying I love you. I just want to live in the moment. At the same time the other person may be looking for those three letter words. In order for them to stay, those words are needed.
Love as an Action
So the bigger question lies in how one is supposed to express love outside of words. This could mean different things to different people. I guess that’s why we have 5 different love languages. According to author, Gary Chapman, the five love languages include words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch, acts of service, and receiving gifts. This is a good foundation to show your love for someone instead of merely saying it. The best way to show love is to learn the ways that significant other wants to be loved. In some cases, they may have no idea. Learning who they are as a person and using your intuition to gauge what kind of love to give is the best part of starting a new relationship.
Sex Does Not Equal Love
The biggest trick that sexual attraction gives is that once you have sex then that means love is inevitable. Just because you have sex with another person does not mean that the other person knows that you love them. People can have sex and not be in love. Happens all the time.