We’ve are living in a culture where everyone seemingly wants to be seen. Kids start an Instagram account only with the goal of becoming an influencer. We spend most of our time checking Facebook and Twitter wondering if we’ve received any new likes or retweets. The truth is you’re not the center of attention. Here comes the harsh truth… not too many people actually care about you.
If you are spending time accumulating followers and fans, this is even more true. Sure you have friends and family that care about your well being, but at the end of the day no one is going to put you front and center, like you would yourself. I hope not to be a downer with this post, but show how the realization that you are not the center of everyone’s attention is actually liberating.
When you put everyone’s perspective before your own, we constantly worry about what others think of you. How will I look today? Did I just say something stupid? What if they hate me for doing that? These type of thoughts eventually lead to poor decisions and what should become priority in your life. A person who puts other people’s perspective at the forefront will only do things to satisfaction of other people. He/she would work hard only because they wanted to make a supervisor happy, or stay in a toxic relationship due to fear of losing someone. At this point you may be feeling like you’re accomplishing something by keeping these relationships, together, but really you’re wasting your life.
“Self-care is never a selfish act—it is simply good stewardship of the only gift I have, the gift I was put on earth to offer to others.”
– Parker Palmer
So why does “nobody cares” becomes a liberating statement? People are very good at summarizing people based on their entire experience, not just one instance. People don’t care about your mistakes. It only becomes a problem when you don’t learn from them over time. This gives you freedom. Freedom to take chances. Freedom to fail. Freedom to leave and start anew.
But you may now have a different thought. If nobody cares about you, do you matter? The truth is, you do matter. You matter to yourself. Once you make that realize this, others will start to appreciate you regardless of how you think you are perceived. You can’t be satisfied by making others happy if you’re not happy yourself.