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Be Grateful for Others, But Don’t Forget to Thank Myself
Giving thanks isn’t something I only do once a year before discount shopping. It’s something I can and should make an active practice of doing. When I start to overlook the perception of harm, I start to be thankful for the love that I receive from others. The more I actively thank others for the love they give me, the more I recognize and focus on this rather than the negativity that I am used to. I want to acknowledge the good within my life and dismiss anything I perceive as bad.
There’s a strong correlation between gratitude and overall well-being. Those who practice gratitude find higher levels of joy and optimism. More importantly, gratitude for others strengthens the bonds I already have with other people. Through gratitude, I receive the positive perspective I need to live a flourishing life of love. This is how I become Love. When I thank others, not for what they’ve done but simply because they exist, I start to see the good in people.
Gratitude Journals Aren’t It
This is not a reason for me to go out and get a gratitude journal. In the last few years, I’ve gone through a lot of journals with it not bringing much in terms of happiness. Simply writing that I am thankful for another person isn’t enough. I must step back a bit because what I wrote in my journal usually had nothing to do with people. I would write something to the effect of, “I’m grateful that the birds are chirping this morning.” That did very little to the heartache I felt because of a miscommunication I had with a coworker the day before. The beautiful day meant nothing to a person with an unforgiving heart. Gratitude isn’t a self-help tool to make me happier. It’s something I do to show genuine show appreciation to others.
I don’t get the most out of gratitude until I honor and acknowledge others through action. Words are nice, but love is an action. When I thank someone, I should do it in a way that person knows of their connection to me. I should thank someone in a way in which I don’t see or even care about their flaws. I’m not even talking about the people I love only. This goes beyond your family, friends, and coworkers. Everyone deserves recognition for being alive and being their perfect selves.
Be Grateful to Myself
When I am giving thanks, I should not forget to thank myself. Even though thanking others is something that should be greatly practiced, there will be times when others don’t reciprocate. I shouldn’t expect them to. Their sense of gratitude means nothing if I don’t have an appreciation for yourself. I tend to overlook myself. How proud do I think your past self would be if they looked at me now? It should be easy for me to thank the person who’s gone through all the experiences to make me the perfect person I am today.
Gratitude to self should not be mistaken as a way of feeling superior. The notion of ‘superior’ is inherently one of feeling above or better than another person. It’s this point of confusion that can lead some to ignore the dimension of gratitude to self as they think that this means that they are somehow going to slip into some sort of self-adoration or even narcissism.
Appreciating myself allows me to widen my perspective on my circumstances. I typically look towards others as an example to withstand any turmoil in my life. I must remember that hurt is all the same and shows up in different forms. Whenever I feel like I am going through an issue, I can use the past as a reminder to tell myself that this, too, will pass.
Eat that Dessert
When I thank myself, I give reasons for the appreciation. When I can give reasoning, I gain clarity on who I am. The negative thoughts that made me a victim no longer seem important. I feel better connected to my perfection. When I can find positivity in myself, there’s no need for the inner critic. In all honesty, I need an inner cheerleader.
Whenever I perceive a tough day, I grab a dessert like milk tea. I don’t stop there. As I eat that dessert, I think of all the times I showed up as my authentic self, even if the day was a tough one for me. I remember the times when my parents took me out to celebrate an accomplishment. I think I should do that for myself today. If I need a kid’s meal from McDonald’s, it’s time to hit up the drive-thru and thank myself for being me.
Questions and Responses
What is gratitude, and why is it important?
Gratitude is the practice of recognizing and appreciating the good in life, including the kindness and presence of others. Studies show that gratitude improves well-being, fostering joy, optimism, and stronger relationships. It helps shift focus from negativity to positivity, encouraging personal growth and emotional resilience.
Is gratitude more than just saying “thank you”?
Yes. While saying “thank you” is important, true gratitude involves deeper appreciation through actions. It’s about recognizing someone’s value and expressing it meaningfully. Whether through thoughtful gestures or time spent with someone, gratitude goes beyond words to strengthen connections.
Why isn’t keeping a gratitude journal always effective?
Though gratitude journals can help some people, writing down general thoughts—like appreciating the weather—might not address emotional challenges or strained relationships. For gratitude to be impactful, it should be specific and connected to the people and experiences that shape our lives.
How does gratitude affect relationships?
Gratitude strengthens relationships by fostering a positive perspective. When people feel valued for who they are—not just for what they do—they are more likely to build deeper connections. Gratitude also helps navigate conflicts by focusing on what’s good in the relationship, rather than fixating on flaws.
Should gratitude extend beyond close relationships?
Absolutely. Practicing gratitude isn’t limited to family, friends, or coworkers. Acknowledging and appreciating strangers and acquaintances—simply for being themselves—cultivates a sense of universal connection and empathy, fostering kindness in everyday interactions.
Why is self-gratitude important?
Self-gratitude is about recognizing your own efforts, growth, and resilience. It ensures that your sense of worth isn’t dependent on external validation. By appreciating yourself, you nurture inner peace, reduce negative self-talk, and build emotional resilience.
What’s the connection between gratitude and well-being?
Gratitude has been linked to improved mental health, including reduced stress and anxiety. It fosters optimism, increases happiness, and promotes stronger social bonds. Regularly practicing gratitude can help shift your focus from life’s difficulties to the positive aspects of your experiences.
Can gratitude help during tough times?
Yes. While gratitude doesn’t eliminate hardships, it offers perspective by helping you appreciate the good that exists alongside challenges. Reflecting on past experiences and the strengths you’ve gained can remind you that difficult times are temporary and manageable.
How does gratitude differ from obligation?
Gratitude is voluntary and arises from genuine appreciation, while obligation often comes from social expectations or a sense of duty. True gratitude feels uplifting and empowering, not burdensome. It’s an act of love, not a transaction.
Why does society sometimes promote shallow gratitude?
Social norms often encourage surface-level gratitude, like saying “thank you” out of politeness. While this isn’t inherently bad, deep and authentic gratitude takes time and effort, requiring mindfulness and reflection. Building meaningful connections through gratitude goes beyond the occasional expression of thanks.
Can practicing gratitude prevent burnout?
Yes, gratitude can counteract burnout by fostering positive emotions and reminding you of the meaning behind your work or relationships. When you focus on what’s going well, even amidst challenges, it can renew your motivation and sense of purpose.
What role does gratitude play in self-care?
Gratitude enhances self-care by encouraging you to appreciate and nurture yourself. It reminds you to celebrate progress, take breaks, and treat yourself with kindness—whether through small indulgences or acts of self-acknowledgment.
How can small acts of gratitude make a difference?
Even small moments of gratitude—like thanking a colleague for their help or appreciating a friend’s presence—can have a ripple effect. They strengthen relationships, foster positivity, and encourage more gratitude from others, creating a cycle of kindness and well-being.