girl kissing another girl on the stairs

What if I Told You Love is a Sacrifice?

I'm putting down all the business books. All the psychology books. All the self help books. I just want to learn one thing, how to love.

The older I get, the more that I realize that love is a sacrifice. I don’t necessarily mean a romantic relationship. It can be any relationship in this case. We talk about being individuals and having our own values and ways of doing things. There’s definitely nothing wrong with that. There comes a time where you have to do for others while forgoing what makes you, you. This shouldn’t be done in obligation, but in love. This type of love is selfless. There’s nothing wrong about being close in touch with our own beliefs and morals, but a lot of us are afraid to love because we keep so closely tucked to us. Our ego won’t allow us to rejected because the ego is the thing that we need to remove in order to love.

“There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love”

Ever notice that two people are rarely in love at the same time. One person may want to show love while the other is apathetic to the relationship. Love happens on an individual basis. It can’t start until someone ignites it and it can’t continue until the person reciprocates. The crazy thing about our brains is that we are hardly detect our own actions, but we find it easy to recognize if we are not getting the love that we deserve. This may lead to expectations towards other people. Expectations aren’t love because you put someone in a box that doesn’t allow them to show authentic love because they aren’t sacrificing the things you would want them to sacrifice. Constantly thinking about ourselves disallows our heads and hearts to be set on others.

When it becomes hard to love

The difficult part of this life is taking our mind off our expectations and loving others for the sake of who they are. Will there be mistakes? Of course, but we all make mistakes. We shouldn’t love others any less just like we shouldn’t love ourselves any less for our mistakes. We aren’t placed on this planet to judge. It’s hard because this way of living means that we have detach from of our natural way of thinking and reactions to feelings in order to form genuine relationships. When make love a sacrifice, we choose to honor the feelings of others. Just as the feelings are your own. That’s the golden rule, right?

It’s very hard to love when you don’t feel reciprocation. This is the part of the post where I get vulnerable and say that I’m having the same complications. How do you love someone who rejects you? Again, it’s about removing yourself from the situation and seeing their side of the story. Yes, even when there isn’t an apology. Rejection and hatred are real things. In order for us to receive more love, we must emit more love.

Love is patient, Love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

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